Summer is over, and I am ready to put away my summer dresses in exchange for some cozy knits.
I can’t help look back at the end of the trip we took to Las Vegas and think about all the fun pieces I took with me. I felt this look and the two-piece set were some of the most daring outfits I’ve put together. They both show a lot more skin, the two-piece set showed some torso, and this cross back romper shows off a lot of my back. Outside of the beach and Vegas, I feel I would more likely wear this as a swimsuit cover-up. As effortless as this piece looks, it was not easy putting it back on after going to the restroom (the struggle with rompers!)
I’ve gained a lot of self-confidence in myself and what I wear as I step out of my comfort zone and try different things. I don’t really talk about body positivity, but last week I attended a poetry workshop focused on self-love hosted by my blogger friend Ani Chivchyan of Yours Truly, Ani. It’s been a long time since I’ve written poetry, but the workshop made me realize something pretty amazing when I look back at what I was experiencing during this outfit shoot in April 2018.
For one, as much as I smiled, I was feeling awful. I mentioned in a previous post I was sick during most of the weekend, but it wasn’t the first time I had experienced this type of sickness. It started right before I left my first real job and made my transition to a new department and office. I would feel nauseous and my stomach would tighten. I made a few doctor’s trips and took some pills to help alleviate the symptoms. It was hard to pinpoint what was wrong with me, but my doctor concluded it was stress which caused adrenaline to be released and made me lose my appetite and have these gastrointestinal issues.
I felt like one of those prescription commercials where the woman can’t go anywhere unless there is a bathroom nearby. I felt very cautious and would be nervous about going out and having to use the restroom or feel nauseous. I began to meditate more, but I still felt uneasy and anxious about getting sick and relying on things like Zantac or anti-nausea medication.
Fast-forward to now and what I learned about myself at this Self-Love Poetry Workshop. While extreme, the biggest act of self-love I made for myself was removing myself from a stressful work situation and saying to myself that I would be okay. I am happy to report since leaving my office job, I haven’t felt sick like I used to, and that is a huge relief for me. I feel like I have gotten into a good rhythm in balancing job hunting as a freelancer and listing items for sale on Poshmark and feel very optimistic about what I am working towards, especially for the site updates.
Lately, I’ve been focused on saying yes, particularly to things outside of my comfort zone, and this workshop felt like one of those moments since I have gotten used to staying in at home more.
Self-love and self-care can look different for everyone, but now that you have the realization I made regarding my connection of leaving a stressful job to no longer getting sick, here’s the poem I wrote from the workshop with some minor edits:
I learned a lot about the cocoa bean process while in Guatemala in July, and since I decided to resign while I was there, it seemed like a fitting way to tie that analogy to myself.
Words have power, and while we might have flaws, it is also important to recognize the good in us and our limitless potential. I hope you can show yourself some self-love either by writing yourself a letter or telling yourself something you are proud of doing recently. It can be something small, like doing laundry or completing an errand, the important thing is to just start.
Until next time,